Thatcher’s Clothes To Be Burned At 2,200 Degrees Fahrenheit


Her clothes were the height of fashion.

A collection of items that belonged to Margaret Thatcher are to be burned at a searing hot temperature of 2,200 degrees Fahrenheit after the Victoria and Albert museum turned down an offer to exhibit her putrid rags in their esteemed institution.

The collection, which includes dresses, jewellery and handbags, contain highly-toxic traces of Thatcher’s DNA and can infect innocent children who should never be exposed to the tiniest trace of such a truly awful person.

Dr. Renwick Thackeray of the Center for Dickensian Diseases recommended the incineration.

“We have to be careful with anything tainted by Thatcher especially if there’s particles of her nasty DNA which could infect babies and dogs with right wing views so vile they make Benito Mussolini look like Mother Teresa,” said the doctor.

“The malevolent spirit of Thatcher pervades every one of those items like the stench of marijuana in your clothes after attending an outdoor Snoop Dogg concert so we can’t be too careful.”

Some prominent Tories, including David Cameron, are trying to purchase the items in order to create an army of Thatcher clones, an abomination that could be devastating for the future of humanity but the doctor was hopeful the torching of her rotten tat would deem the monster gone for good.

Thackeray added: “If the flames cannot destroy her rags then we will bury them in a lead-lined tomb deep in the Earth’s core.

“The tomb would be guarded at all times to ensure her venomous presence never befouls this Earth again.”