Don Lemon’s Blackness Revoked By Popular Demand

Don Lemon


Black people across the country have unanimously agreed to expel Don Lemon from the black race due to his incessant stupidity and his unfailing habit of driving people mad with his shit-for-brains opinions and dumbass questions.

A press release was issued earlier today revoking Lemon’s blackness while informing other races that he’s up for grabs if anyone wants him.

The press release reads as follows:

Dear Everybody,

It is with no regret whatsoever that we, the good and righteous black people of Earth, hereby give notice of the expulsion of CNN ‘journalist’ Don Lemon from the black race.

His constant jackassery, relentless bufoonery and unceasing imbecility has proved a constant embarrassment to us all and we have decided he is no longer a worthy member of our proud people.

We, therefore, offer him up for other races to claim for free.


All black people

Community leader Samuel Rawlins III, who prepared the statement and organized the expulsion, said: “I don’t want to do this to another black person but it’s high time Lemon got the boot. Some other race can have him as he’s pissed us off for too long and we’re sick of his crap.

“To be honest we’d rather have Justin Beiber. That’s how much he’s annoyed us.

“I’m hoping the white race takes him. I think he’ll find a good home there.”

So far no other race has claimed Lemon although reports coming in from NASA suggest the Mars Rover has picked up extraterrestrial transmissions indicating alien interest.

Don Lemon officially ceases to be black from midnight tonight.