Shrieking in terror first thing in the morning is normal for many Americans but waking up and seeing Trump’s amber visage when you look in the mirror is not normal. Unfortunately, that’s what millions of desperate Americans are experiencing today.
The strange phenomenon of looking in the mirror and seeing Donald Trump’s ugly face instead of your own ugly face is affecting large swathes of the American population and the epidemic is spreading as Trump continues to triumph in the primaries.
Scientists claim the affliction, known as Trump-Induced Psychological and Ocular Degeneration or Trump Head for short, is brought on by ignoring the country’s racial and income inequality and not doing a thing to stop one’s country descending into political chaos.
A sufferer who wishes to remain anonymous said: “I think perhaps I had a hand in my own downfall.
“I thought it was all a joke when Mr. Trumpy said he would run and I kinda agreed with him a little about the Muslim thing but I’m paying for my complacency and he’s haunting my visions like a bad orange hate-fueled acid trip.
“Can you imagine seeing Trump every time you look at your own reflection?
“If he becomes president it will be my fault because I didn’t do enough to stop him. I’m an evil person, I know I am.”
As yet, there’s no cure for the disease and doctors warn that if Trump makes it to the White House sufferers could end up with permanent Trump Head leading to further psychotic episodes followed by a swift pain-filled death.
“I have to resign myself with the thought that somewhere deep down, there could be a little bit of Trump inside of me whether I like it or not,” said the sufferer.
“God help us all.”
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