Ferguson Police Cameras Get Editing Functions

“Smile, before I punch you in the face repeatedly.”

Police officers in Ferguson, Missouri have begun wearing specially-designed body cameras so they can capture the next time they shoot dead an unarmed teenager with his hands up in cold blood.

The cameras used by the Ferguson PD are markedly different to cameras used by other forces as they feature editing functions allowing each police officer to carefully cut the footage just like a feature film editor would do when editing a Hollywood movie.

Police Captain Brian Grant said: “We welcome the cameras as it will give our officers increased protection from accusations of racism and brutality which are totally untrue.

“Some of the new functions are great like the Record Pause button that allows us to pause the recording for just enough time to use the lavatory before un-pausing and going about our day. Of course we would never use it to hide a suspect being severely beaten because we don’t do that sort of thing.

“You can also cut the audio if you need to have a private conversation with a colleague or if you’re relaying classified information. Of course we would never use it to hide the screams while we mete out a vicious foot stomping to some guy’s head because we don’t do that sort of thing.

“Another function we love is Blur Faces which can be used to protect the identity of innocent individuals who we film accidentally. Of course we would never use it to hide the bruises on some guy’s face after pistol-whipping him during a routine traffic stop because we don’t do that sort of thing.”

The Ferguson police first used the cameras last week during a stop and search incident where a member of the public died as a result of a police shooting. Unfortunately, the batteries on the camera ran out so no footage was recorded.