Black Man At Classical Concert Stared At

“Who the fuck are you looking at?”

A young black man was constantly stared at yesterday while attending a classical music concert at Boston Symphony Hall.

Avid classical music fan Eric Lanoir entered the auditorium for an eagerly-awaited evening recital of piano works by Rachmaninoff, Schubert and Mozart when the rest of the patrons began staring at him quizzically.

The incident first occurred at around 19:30 then at 21:00 during the half-time interval and finally at about 23:00 when the concert finished.

Concert goer Janice Smithson witnessed the staring: “As soon as he walked into the foyer everyone looked at him and continued to look at him even when he sat down. Of course I only joined in to see what was going on. I wouldn’t dream of making black people feel uncomfortable. I voted for Obama by the way.”

Another concert attendee Daniel Hausbaum admitted to being one of the starers: “I thought he was a staff member at first but I was shocked when he sat down in one of the boxes. I wondered what he was doing in a place like this. Was he lost? Did he make a mistake? I know it’s rude to stare but I couldn’t help myself.”

Staring at black people in public places has been reported in the UK, Germany, France, Sweden, Japan and across the United States at various locations. No one knows what causes people to behave this way but scientists studying Obsessive Staring Syndrome (OSS) at the University of Creative Knowledge believe a combination of pig-ignorance, awful manners and rank stupidity are the main triggers.

For Eric Lanoir this occurrence is all too frequent: “I hate being stared at so I go about my daily business looking straight ahead with my head held high. It’s not ideal but it gets me through the day so I’m sticking with it.

“Otherwise I’d have to keep punching everybody all day long.”