White College Kid In Blackface ‘Mistakenly’ Shot By Police

“You have the right to remain shot, beaten and killed.”

A college student in Halloween blackface was shot by police in Cambridge, MA late last Friday.

Eugene Claremont was walking home after attending a Ghetto Pimps & Bitches party at a college club house when he was stopped by the police who mistook him for an African American male up to no good.

Claremont was staggering after drinking too much alcohol so the police decided to question him and search him for narcotics.

Things took a turn for the worse when Claremont put his hand in his pocket to retrieve his ID. The police, fearing Claremont was armed, shot him eight times in his legs and torso.

Claremont’s near lifeless body slumped to the ground and when they examined him they discovered they had shot a young white male and not a black criminal.

The unfortunate student was immediately taken to Massachusetts General Hospital where his condition is described as stable.

Officer Derek O’Leary said: “If I knew he was one of us I would’ve approached him differently. Maybe I wouldn’t have stopped him at all. I feel really bad and I regret the whole sorry episode. If only he said something like ‘Hey, I’m white’ this would never have happened.”

Local police captain Hank McVitie warns all party goers going out on Halloween in blackface to alert police verbally that they’re a white person so we don’t have anymore accidents.

Eugene Claremont is expected to make a full recovery. He has so far received $500,000 in donations from members of the public.